Chasing Time

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Every day I get up, sometimes early, sometimes late, check my todo list, read my Bible, and sprint from one task to another, breathlessly trying to keep up with the things that may or may not be important. At the end of the week it always seems like the important things slipped into the cracks while unimportant details have taken the largest parts of my time.

I am a multitasker and in the rush of the day my divided attention fails to complete the things I want to do the most or am asked to do.

When I am asked what I did that day, I often come up empty or embarrassed because of the lunch break that lasted too long because of Pinterest or the laundry load that turned into a two hour Firefly marathon.

I don’t eat well or exercise because I don’t leave myself the time after filling my day with foolish pursuits.

I have to admit that right now a lot of the procrastination is directly related to a nauseating feeling that comes every time I try to study. When I sit down to do school, I feel sick; there is no pleasure in it anymore. So, I piddle around during the day to avoid it and then frantically try to catch up when my deadlines creep up on me. I feel paralyzed by my own drive at the moment.

I don’t think I am supposed to have circles under my eyes or the headaches and dizziness from lack of sleep.

“It is in vain that you rise up early and go late to rest, eating the bread of anxious toil; for he gives to his beloved sleep.”

– Psalm 127:2

God created the entire world in six days and then rested on the seventh. He commanded it from his people.

“Six days you shall labor, and do all your work, but the seventh day is a Sabbath to the Lord your God. “

 – Exodus 20: 9-10

Rest is not something to think about once a week. It is a lifestyle. The only way it will become fulfilling is if I start living every day purposefully, to its fullest, but not its busiest.  In taking that time too soon I am stealing the fullness I can find in resting the way God created me to. The problem with me, and many others, is I rest too soon and it is not a fulfilling rest. Then, in order to even it out, I don’t rest and push myself too hard in order to catch up again.

I have goals and dreams, hopes and direction. The only way to pursue them excellently is to organize my life in a way that makes the most of the time God has given me. This means stewarding my body and environment, taking care of my responsibilities, and spending more time with God than my laptop.

In the pursuit of this I am trying to do this for one week. I have learned I can do anything for one week… even cut out sugar and caffeine.

– W

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