Uranium in the Water

Have you ever read Anne of Green Gables? Before Anne arrives Rachel Lynd, town gossip and general blabbermouth, tells Marilla that adopted children, especially orphans are predisposed to terrible acts. One of her examples is a little girl who put strychnine in the well of her family. That didn’t end well. Fortunately even strychnine was not in the realm of Anne’s imagination, but at our little homestead uranium is.

On our mailbox has a notice saying not to drink the water which has led to much speculation. My favorite theory? A mad scientist from the Air Force Base brought his secret experiment home to tweak it causing large amounts of uranium to seep into the water table.

It’s possible.

Meanwhile, mom has been whipping out her stash of preparedness stuff including 10 2-gallon jugs of filtered water and a Berky water filter. B asked shortly after we started filtering all our water, “What do people do who don’t have a Berky?” She is our resident sponge, if she isn’t touching water, she might shrivel up and die…

I’m still hoping that the uranium will cause mutations and turn us all into X-men, but I was told I would actually have to drink water for that to happen. Even then I am more likely to die of poisoning. Maybe our bees will become mutants and one will sting me and I will develop bee-like wings, sight, and a stinger. Though it would be super messed up to sting something and then die because, like a bee, my guts were ripped out.

With my luck it would be a uranium infused earthworm or a mutating katydid.

– W

 

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